Good advice in my email today

AAWP's Weekly Words of Wedding Wisdom™ Wedding Etiquette and The Workplace... Copyright 2009 Deborah McCoy, all rights reserved. Weddings and work can cause stress so we're going to pose a couple of scenarios that may apply to you. You've got plenty of "friends" on the job but your budget prevents inviting them to the wedding. On top of it, they want to throw a shower for you (and you know that people who are invited to or host pre-wedding festivities must be invited to the wedding). You've also got a couple of "good friends" whom you'd like to invite? What to do? Be honest. Tell your co-workers that you appreciate the shower offer but that you'd rather have a lunch invitation. Let them know that your wedding is a close family, friend affair-with a limited budget. As far as your "good friends" from work, don't hide the fact that they will be invited. (Your "friends" will understand and appreciate your honesty.) And what about the owner of your company, or "big" boss, and then there's the manager, or the person whom you answer to? My advice: Invite them! It doesn't matter if your relationship is less than heavenly. The respect you demonstrate with an invitation can only put feathers in your cap! I offer this info since we just read an article that suggests the opposite of the advice we just gave. Here's what it said: Don't invite your boss or manager. After all, weddings are "private" affairs--but invite them to showers, etc. if you have a close relationship. What??? They're expected to go to your engagement party, shower, or both--bring gifts, you're "close" to them and they're not to receive a wedding invitation??? You've got to be kidding... But there's more: the article says that you can be selective about whom you invite from the office--but advises be "...discreet... Word travels fast around the workplace, and it's easy to hurt feelings..." Why in the world would you take this advice? Why would you hurt your boss's or manager's feelings, or treat them disrespectfully by not inviting them? And why would you chance hurting the feelings of your workplace colleagues? The former is the "yellow brick road" to a pink-slip and the latter is an invitation to a "lonely-hearts' club" because your friends will be sorely lacking. Honesty and respect are the bywords when it comes to wedding etiquette and the workplace! Happy Weddings!